13 th of January 2023
Its anther day and the desperation continue.
Seeing the woman downstairs talking to the Syrian smoking in front of his daughter and pointing to my window is devastating.
Does cigarette smoke not affect the children? I would assume so according to scientific.
No, that is not a problem for him, the problem is the woman who dares to light her fireplace to keep some warmth in her body.
He has not come down again to complain.
He did not go to the garage and carry the water out.
Neither he or Dahlias husband did anything about the flood in the garage. They simply don´t care. The only thing they care about is breaking the woman in the middle.
I have to admit it is affecting me.
I just want to be left in piece.
I have more serious problems in my life than idiots like the Syrian and those who stand by him.
I was thinking the morning that I need to find someone to talk to about my emotional situation just to relieve the pressure from my mind.
I have been crying again and I know what is affecting me but there is nothing I can do except waiting and praying that everyone is safe.
I am truly trying to accept what is and believe in what will be.
I do pray to God which I normally don´t do much of.
I have somehow to get my strength back to be able to handle whatever comes my way.
Writing helps.
There are people in my life that are true friends and would support me if I spoke about how I feel but I am afraid of crying and totally loosing it.
My veggies arrived yesterday and we were talking a little like we always do and I almost broke down. This is my emotional situation at the moment. If someone is nice to me, I break.
Its another day and the 13 th of this month. Every day is a blessing in a way.
I will get through this and perhaps the outcome will be exactly what I want it to be. Until then I have to be strong.
Crying is ok, it relieves the worst pain for a while.
Hulda Bjornsdottir
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