12 days

29^th of May 2022

You wake up in the morning and it is a day of despair!

12 days of waiting and then you will know how your future shapes.

I woke up this morning, sad and frustrated, trying to see the hope and beauty.

Now I am up and the day has begun.

What will it be like? Will it be like yesterday full of despair and crying or will it be a day with calm and content?

I don´t know.

This morning I thought about the people who suffer from depression all the time and how their mornings are.

Truly we don´t understand how depression affects people, until you have been there yourself.

Last months have been difficult for me and I have been up and down emotionally. Some days have been perfect and others have been truly bad.

I will survive and I will take whatever life has in store for me but this is complicated and will take a lot of work.

I am thinking about all the people that are poor and don´t have food on their table or roof over their head or clothes to wear. Those are the poor ones in Iceland and they get poorer while the rich ones get richer.

I am lucky, I have food on my table, I have roof over my head and I have clothes to wear.

I live in a beautiful little land and I have got true friends here.

I love my little land dearly and I would never go back to Iceland. There is nothing there I miss and the only reason I think about it every month is because I get my pension from there, because there I spent most of my working period and saved for my pension days.

The government takes 45 percent of my savings every month and the tax takes 37 percent. If I would be allowed to keep my pension savings, I would be well off just like so many other who now belong to the poor people in Iceland. The richer get richer and they say that there is no money to take proper care of those who made the foundation the rich are now sucking.

Many of those who have saved for the future and are now over 65 have left Iceland to be able to manage the final quarter of their staying on this earth.

I am depressed these days because I don´t see my future as I dreamed about it would be.

When I think about the others, I am grateful for my life and ashamed of being depressed and thinking that a new day has nothing in store to look forward to.

This day is my day and, in my power, to make it a good day. I have got the strength and I am going to use it.

My lesson is to be grateful for what I have got and seize the moment every day.

12 days to go and then everything will change.

Be brave and try to find something positive because you my reader are powerful, worthy and could be grateful for what you are this moment.

Hulda Björnsdóttir