I know how to be used!

3rd of November 2024

The SHITS are everywhere.

When I think about it I have been surrounded by shits most of my life.

I thought the SCAMMER was the first one but that is not so.

I am not going into the stories this time but this crossed my mind yesterday.

I have been trying to figure out why I was put into the situation in 2021 where the “relationship” began and what the lesson from it all was or is!

In my mind yesterday I saw throughout my life how I have been surrounded by one SHIT after another.

Some have been close for a long time and some for a short while, some have been relatives and some have been just people around me.

This makes the situation with the scammer make more sense.

 I turn to what I know!

I know how to be used!

I know how to sacrifice everything and then being betrayed and put into the mud and my reputation destroyed by the shits who have used my good heart.

This is a pattern I know by heart even from childhood.

They say that until we learn the lesson it appears again and again.

That is what has happened during my long life, again and again and again!

Perhaps the Nigerian SHIT was the final straw and now I have learned how to take care of myself first and after that I can take care of the world if I want to.

In midst of all this turmoil I have been lucky and I have had true friends who have not used me and we have been mutual friends, being there for each other.

Here in my little land, I was lucky and found friends that have been mine all the years.

Those people are my saviours. Without them I would not have survived.

Those are the people I would always help when in need and those are the people I love to support and be around for them.

I have been here almost 15 years and some of my friends here have been in my life all this time, or most of it. That is something to be grateful for.

For those friends I would go the extra mile if they needed!

I don´t have people in my life now that are user.

I have people in my life who love me and respect me, as I love them and respect them.

When I look at my current situation and see what I have accomplished these 2 years after getting free of the NIGERIAN SHIT, I am proud of myself.

Being proud is a good feeling.

It means everything is just as it should be and the people in my life are good people.

I took a long walk today around my little village and just was!

Yes, I just was, there was nothing pushing me around, there was just calm and breathing in the village.

The weather was mild and few people around.

I have not taken such a long walk in a long time. I simply didn’t have the energy to do it.

Emotional break down affects the physical situation and it takes time to build up the energy but it is possible.

Someone said to me the other day: “Its all about never stopping, just keeping going.”

The SHIT broke me, but now I am mending the pieces and they are falling into place day by day.

This is what I want.

This is what I can do because I am not struggling alone. I have strong friendship to lean on when needed.

The work is not done but it is well on its way!

I don´t know if you, the reader, have figured out how important friendship is and just knowing that there is someone who you can always ask for guidance makes the life beautiful.

I am the lucky one today.

If my friends would need my help I would help them gladly. I have learned that its part of me, an important part, to give!

My life would be empty if I could not give my best friends something!

Hulda Bjornsdottir